Completely Non-Important Goblin Information
- Goblins invented chairs, but only the wobbly kind. Stable chairs are a human conspiracy.
- The average goblin meal consists of 43% mushrooms, 12% stolen bread, 8% suspicious stew, and 37% things that should not be eaten.
- A group of goblins is called a grumble. If they’re louder, it’s called a snarl.
- Goblins do not collect stamps. They collect other people’s stamp collections and then lose them.
- The traditional goblin alarm clock is another goblin hitting you with a ladle.
- Goblins once tried to make their own card game. It lasted three minutes before someone ate the deck.
- Goblins measure time in grumps (the amount of time until the next complaint).
- The most common goblin greeting is a scowl followed by the words: “What do YOU want?”
- Goblins believe dice always roll better if you threaten them first.
- Krizbella once tried tea. She bit the cup and threw the rest at Jugbite.