Right. After moons of bickering, button-mashing, and threatening the talking box, we’ve finally done it—we’ve made a Facebook page. Took long enough.
Don’t ask me why it was so hard. First, Jugbite forgot the password three times. Then Krizbella tried to set the profile picture to a blurry photo of her lunch (which was mostly bones). And Skorn kept insisting we needed a fax machine to make it “official.”
But it’s done now. The page exists. It’s alive. And we’ll be using it to:
Shout about new games we’re trying.
Complain about rules we don’t like.
Show off shiny game bits we’ve “borrowed” from friends.
Argue with strangers on the internet (our favorite pastime).
So go ahead—like the page, follow it, poke it, whatever you humans do. We’ll be there, grumbling, posting, and occasionally sharing something useful between all the nonsense.
Now excuse me—I have to figure out what a “cover photo” is and why it’s the wrong size again.
Jugbitе earned his name the old-fashioned way—by biting a jug. Not once, but many times, until the jug shattered and half his teeth went with it. Instead of shame, he wore the scars proudly, declaring,
“If a jug can’t bite back, it deserves to be chewed.”
From that day, the goblins called him Jugbite—and none dared mock him unless they wanted a pottery shard in the eye.
He’s a hulking goblin by cave standards—stooped, scarred, with a face like a smashed lantern. His eyes are yellow and perpetually squinted, as if the world itself irritates him (which it does). He wears a patchwork cloak stitched from banners looted off human adventurers, and a crown made of twisted spoons, because he says “metal tastes better than gold.”
Known for his grim demeanor, Jugbite doesn’t laugh. Ever. When other goblins cackle and scheme, he just grumbles, spits, and plots in silence. His voice is gravel in a stewpot, and when he growls an order, goblins obey out of sheer unease.
Yet he’s clever—too clever. Jugbite organizes raids with military precision, striking caravans at night, vanishing before dawn. He’s also a ruthless collector of shinies, especially anything ceramic—cups, pots, jugs. Rumor says he keeps a cavern piled high with them, gnawed and cracked, trophies of his endless grudge against pottery.
To his followers, Jugbite is both terrifying and oddly inspiring: a goblin too stubborn to die, too mean to smile, and too cunning to overthrow.
